The Thing about poor nasty old Joan Rivers, was that she was vulgar--

Vulgar in a specifically American East Coast, unreflectingly heterosexual, pro-Israeli, anti-Palestinian, Zionist Jewess kind of way that appalled, at the same time as its utter naked viciousness shocked. Somehow, she reminded me of Françoise de Graffigny, though I think she was smarter than Voltaire's houseguest and had a better sense of humor.  At any rate, I didn't pay much attention to Joan Rivers, even when she called Obama a "faggot" and Michelle a "tranny," because it seemed to me that, like the ewige alte Jüdin Joan was (as in "I Remember Mama") she had hit on something, something very important that nobody else was giving the attention it deserved--and calling it by just slightly the wrong name (as exasperating Jewish mamas are always doing).  Obama may or may not be a homosexual sadist (How many times has he been to Afghanistan?), but the important thing about him--that leaps out and grabs you by the throat and worries you--is that he has no character at all.  He's a creature of the Chicago Mob, with the standard Harvard veneer, with no known tastes except a liking for Dijon mustard on his sandwiches, and no enthusiasms or interests--and, so far as is known, he is equally devoid of aversions, pet peeves or dislikes.  Oh, and he makes chilling little jests sometimes about having people murdered.  Cruel it may be to notice, but the East African inheritance of long-limbed gracility, and a sallow, half-negroid complexion, lends him a distinctly non-human, tongue-dartingly saurian allure. It takes a New York Jewess to see the stereotypical faggotry in that (Joan Rivers meet Midge Decter).  I repeat, what I see in Barrack Obama is nothing, nothing, nothing, right down to the utter hollowness of personal affect: Or, if you will, what I see is a shape-shifting, flesh-eating Lizard from Outer Space:  To me, those are identical quantities.  And Michelle, likewise totally without character, is perfect in her non-entity, whether she be Obama's "beard" or paramour--It is wide of the mark, though rude, and, I grant, amusing, to call her a "tranny."

So, it would have been a fretful, vain, peevish and waspish Sultan indeed (or perhaps an unusually prickly paramour) who'd have had Joan Rivers snuffed.